It takes time to make perfect.

Our first positive pregnancy test.
March 2015

 "It takes time to make perfect," became my pregnancy mantra.  I was so eager to conceive and had a schedule and plan set out, which of course... didn't happen. To piggy back off of my last post, trying to conceive can be hard. My story. I don't know if I have infertility issues per say. Not every fertility issues can even be diagnosed. However, our family is a same-sex household and we don't get the benefit of trying for free.  We also seem to take longer to get pregnant than the average fertility patient, so there are definitely challenges in conceiving.  Every pregnancy attempt is timed, medicated, monitored, and very expensive. I've been poked and prodded so far into one successful pregnancy.  It certainly takes the "fun" out of getting pregnant or eliminates the surprise/oops factor, but by no means takes the excitement away when it does happen.

Unfortunately in the US, fertility treatments are covered minimally for heterosexual couples, if at all, and not covered at all for single or same sex couples. That is a huge problem in my opinion. My son took nine attempts and is now lovingly referred to as our "community college baby" because he has already spent his college fund. Not really, but in reality, many things were just put on pause. Travel, buying clothes, restoring our home, replacing vehicles, buying anything nonessential, just became unimportant compared to making a baby.  Saving for a hopeful number two certainly puts our family in that same financial boat again. Any meal out is a potential round of one of the medications. It puts non essential expenses in an interesting light that is for sure.

5 weeks!

I've been fortunate enough that after attempting nine times that I did actually get pregnant and did not have a miscarriage. I could not imagine feeling the excitement and relief of finally getting a positive test, just to lose it a week, month or even 6 months into the pregnancy. I loved my baby before we even conceived with my entire heart. That type of loss would be immeasurable and it breaks my heart that it is such a heavy "secret" weighing on so many woman. You should know that most women (more than 85 percent) who miscarry are able to get pregnant again and give birth to healthy babies. Since most miscarriages occur totally randomly, having one does not increase your risk of experiencing a subsequent pregnancy loss (Source).

I share my story because I think as a woman who "struggles" to get pregnant, we can sometimes feel alone, frustrated, disheartened, or maybe even experience grief. I just wanted to reach out to others who have had a rocky path and share my mantra with you. "It takes time to make perfect."

Jessica Saurez Photography
http://www.jessica-suarez-photography.com/